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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fragile Industrydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Porcelaine
    ASL Info:    27/F/Croatia
    Elite Ratio:    3.9 - 880/703/256
    Words: 134
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 781
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 652



    Description:
       


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    dotsFragile Industrydots
    -------------------------------------------



    ###

    It's the tears that produce me,
    Tears that seduce me
    And in the end of a lonesome truth
    It's the pain that consumes me

    As I wake for the sleepers,
    Shake for the creepers
    In the quiet times of night
    I lose for the keepers

    But strange, in the end
    How much I pretend
    To shy away the darkness
    As though I can mend

    And I tell you my dreams
    That daylight redeems
    As illusions of a victim
    Who's not as she seems

    But am I weak?




    Submitted on 2008-10-17 22:17:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      THIS WAS A REALLY GOOD WRITE. I READ IT A FEW TIMES !!!! IT ALMOST SEEMED EDGAR-ISH. I REALLY DON'T HAVE ANY CRITIQUE OR SUGGESTION, I LOVED EVERYTHING ABOUT IT.

    great write
    llcollins
    | Posted on 2008-10-18 00:00:00 | by L.L.COLLINS | [ Reply to This ]
      This was written very well. It flowed well and the imagery was nice. Not alot of emotion, but hinting at it. I liked it very much. Keep up the good work, and I'll keep reading

    »Haely«
    | Posted on 2008-10-18 00:00:00 | by MinervaBlu | [ Reply to This ]


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