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    dots Submission Name: Days to yearsdots

    Author: Katlord
    ASL Info:    24/no thanks/my room
    Elite Ratio:    2.17 - 375/199/101
    Words: 82
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 767
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 500

       I don't know if the title works or nto but I'm trying to dig myself out of a rut so bare with me please. Comments are appreciated.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDays to yearsdots

    I find myself crying,
    Wishing for the love we once shared.
    My heart has given up,
    It has hidden itself with anger and tears.

    I wish, to hear the those words come from your lips,
    And rest gracefully upon my ears.
    To show you one last time,
    How much Iíve always cared.

    I miss the way you held me,
    The way you kissed away my fears.
    I long for your companionship,
    As the sad days turn into lonely years.

    Submitted on 2008-10-18 06:14:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Well, it's good. There could be some changes made, but I do like it.

    On this line,
    "I wish, to hear _the_ those words come from your lips"

    Typo, I'm sure. I don't dock it against ya.

    I liked the last stanza especially, close syllable equality between interchanging lines and... I'm a fan of rhyming.

    Not that a poem must rhyme to be a poem but... it just sounds nice. Babies even like poetry that rhymes; and, not necessarily children's poetry. I've found, through personal study, that babies like grown up poetry even more. One of my nephews likes Annabel Lee, The Raven, Hymn to the Night, and even The Jewish Cemetery at Newport. Namely, Poe and Longfellow. It's when they get a little older and they know that they don't understand the words that they no longer like it.

    Sorry, that was a personal note.

    Anyway, good poem.

    | Posted on 2009-01-04 00:00:00 | by alittlebithippy | [ Reply to This ]
      OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!1 I love t5his poem! I like the emotion! LOL! I always like your poems tho!
    | Posted on 2008-10-27 00:00:00 | by Demon__666 | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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