Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: save face before the chainsaw hits you in the assdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: silentpoison
    ASL Info:    22/F/Teh Shire
    Elite Ratio:    2.67 - 204/259/118
    Words: 91
    Class/Type: Poetry/Satire
    Total Views: 807
    Average Vote:    3.5000
    Bytes: 640



    Description:
       first thing i've written in 3 months


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotssave face before the chainsaw hits you in the assdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'll be your pornographer
    just hold that pose
    cock in hand
    balls in tow
    ready
    en gaurd
    pause and then
    strike
    cause when your dripping bullets for the camera's
    You're erection's got limelight
    steady moans
    hitting soprano tones
    drowning out the world
    you extinguish the sun
    with your anticipation to cum
    while those looking in
    bask in your glow
    the producers eclipse
    casts you for free
    and your name lingers not
    like your reputation
    through the cyberspace breeze




    Submitted on 2008-10-26 07:19:16     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very graphic.Takes me to a photoshoot through a photographers mindset on a particular woman with potential to be incredible in an uneasy, hectic, complicated and gruesome world.I like the excitement I got from this one.Lustful I must add but only with a pinch which is always artful.Juicy too.Better yet I don't want to say lustful photographer meets busty pornstar.It's more like the glimmering moment of a pornographic director at ease with every move he makes with his eye on success through a single super attractive woman.You did pretty decent here to give tremendous description for such short time.I like these pauses of wordplay too, such as:

    ready
    en guard
    strike with a clear visual through feeling bringing it on with:
    "steady moans", "bask in your glow"
    The last couple lines kinda blow it up in your face with internet reference but the cool thing about that could be that I guess men and women get inspired and fulfill their desires through art based on sex.Simple as that.Another nice little one, more raunchy though lol

    RG
    | Posted on 2010-09-16 00:00:00 | by Rex Gold | [ Reply to This ]
      you wrote about the movie that you and I starred in? you don't look familiar, but hey I guess I've had far too many lays to pin point any one moment...

    well thanks for the money shot and the poem

    thank you
    | Posted on 2008-11-25 00:00:00 | by Smug_Doug | [ Reply to This ]
      I know what to say do that,its absolutely hilarious,
    Im sorry,Ill never be able to take erotic poetry seriously,if alen Ginsberg cant do it,no one can

    -Craig
    | Posted on 2008-11-21 00:00:00 | by Raphael | [ Reply to This ]
      be aware, those words might scare off some people. But i don't know I'm a girl and I like your poem.. I think its really well written but I'm just saying if sex is your focus on poems great, but keep in mind if you want feedback you got to expect the truth.
    And the truth is guys might not know what to say to that. Lol
    | Posted on 2008-10-28 00:00:00 | by TalentedChild | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    167272

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Poems Death written by Mepoduo
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Live In Between written by teika5
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry