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    dots Submission Name: Awaydots

    Author: redthewitch
    ASL Info:    36/f/tiny rural village
    Elite Ratio:    4.02 - 267/175/26
    Words: 144
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 801
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 960

       A narrative poem...

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    The countryside is dotted here and there
    by the lights of farms...homes...
    lights that twinkle in the lonely, passing darkness...
    as the road rushes away, beneath and behind them...
    the too warm air burnishing their cheeks, their noses...
    the map with its crisscrossed lines lit by the dashboard.
    Those scattered lights, like so many beacons for those who live there.
    She wonders...who are they?
    Clinging to these places, liferafts in the distance...
    What kind of lives do they lead? She wonders, her forehead leaning against the cool window.
    He lights a cigarette and she feels both
    the warmth sucking away and the cold blasting inward,
    as he rolls down his window...
    and she's already forgotten about those lives...
    being lived out where those lights beckon, night after night...
    in the dark...as the road rushes away, beneath and behind them.

    Submitted on 2008-11-03 04:13:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      As someone who enjoys taking in a day or two to just drive, I often wonder during these little excursions about the little towns and villages that I drive through. What do they do? Who do they do it with? And where do they go? It's almost the same kind of wondering that you do when you look up at the stars. It's the asking that will never be answered. It's both satisfying and unfulfilling. And what if you could insert yourself into that world, if only as an observer? Would that answer for the asking - would it quench that need to know?

    A beautiful bit of writing - thank you for sharing!

    | Posted on 2016-07-10 00:00:00 | by krs3332003 | [ Reply to This ]
      change the "it's" to "its"

    but yes, passing through, wondering about these lies, what's behind these lights that dot the landscape...thinking about other people's lives and what they are like...a distraction, a moment...and then he lights the cigarette and the now reality returns...and she is back in her own life.

    we are so wrapped up in our own lives these days, it seems we don't focus so much on others...only for the briefest moments.

    this poem also brings back memories for me...ones etched forever..my childhood in the 50's
    and our vacations in Vermont...

    what a beautiful place and what great memories of spending all those summers on the farm.
    having come from Bronx NY it was delightful to get away from the city, even at that young age.

    thanks for this

    | Posted on 2012-04-15 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this, it seemed like a momentary thought of distant life. I hate saying this becuase its so oversaid but your images are fresh and original. You kept a good pace of flashing images which is so central to a narrative poem. It's an appealing poem to me as I am prone to these thoughts of fleeting wonder and it was an interesting read. One thing though, why is this poem going all the way across the right hand side of the page?! lol

    | Posted on 2008-11-04 00:00:00 | by Dead Bell | [ Reply to This ]

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