Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Contraceptives dont work (comedy)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jamar2
    ASL Info:    52/male/Ireland
    Elite Ratio:    2.22 - 53/46/75
    Words: 286
    Class/Type: Poetry/Comedy
    Total Views: 607
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1579



    Description:
       A light hearted look at one of those every day things we are all so familiar with, enjoy.

    jamar.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsContraceptives dont work (comedy)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    This is a story about my darling wife,
    Who wanted to come under the surgical knife.
    We had seven children and wanted no more,
    To be sterilised is all she was asking for.

    From the day we got married, we were so bold,
    Use the rhythm method so we were told.
    All bar doing the TANGO & RUMBA all night,
    Where do you get a band that plays till daylight.

    But she fell pregnant again

    She tried the Dutch Cap but went cherry red,
    When she found it to tight around the forehead.
    We tried the safe period, but the house was always full,
    We had waited three weeks, was going out of my skull.

    But she fell pregnant again

    A midwife told us to make love as she breast fed,
    It was hardly brown Ale, but I got silky hair on my head.
    The coil was next, it had a right hand thread askew,
    That didn't work 'coz the wife was a right hand screw.


    But she fell pregnant again

    A chemist demonstrated the sheath by placing it on his thumb,
    Failing to see how this would work, it had to be done.
    Finally we decided to try oral sex during the spring,
    But talking about it could never replace the real thing.

    But she fell pregnant again

    I hope you understand why she wanted to go under the knife,
    Was it worth all the trouble,? Oh, my dear poor wife.

    She isn't pregnant! PHEW!





    Submitted on 2008-11-12 11:33:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    167831

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry