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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: You Girl!dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Blackphoenix14
    ASL Info:    16/male/AR
    Elite Ratio:    1.56 - 20/64/51
    Words: 134
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 138
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 921



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYou Girl!dots
    -------------------------------------------


    You rain life
    You shine love
    You lift me high
    As the sky above

    I float in your arms
    We brush lips
    Your kisses burn
    My heart skips

    Your eyes hold me
    In a lovers' gaze
    My heart you've captured
    I'm in a daze

    To slumber in your love
    So tender and true
    Makes life so wonderful
    Shiny and new

    You are the angel
    That holds my heart
    I pray nightly
    That we never part

    So please always love me
    Inside and out
    Be true and honest
    Leave no room for doubt

    For you are the one
    I'll love my life long
    Your love's my music
    Your smile my song

    So think of me
    With each breath
    For I'll always love you
    From this day on...........till death




    Submitted on 2008-11-13 01:42:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You're 15.

    It'll pass.
    Unless you plan on dying a tragic death in the next few weeks, I'm pretty certain you won't love her until you die.



    You'll both become bored, and eventually drift apart. Maybe you'll be angry and explode away from each other. Maybe you'll maintain a shaky friendship until that reunion 10, 20 years later. Maybe you'll have a quick shag in the loo while your dates stand around awkwardly by the dessert table.
    Maybe not.

    Maybe you'll get married out of high school and have a plethora of little kiddies. Be fruitful and multiply and all that.
    And then maybe your kids will give head at an early age, and start writing poems over the first girl that slipped her hands down their pants.

    The cycle will continue.


    Tough.





    Love poems:
    http://www.charlesbukowski.20m.com/bukowski_poems.html

    Take a taste.
    Take a shot.

    Set aside the clichés once, just once.

    Breathe deep, etc.

    Lather, Rinse, Repeat.
    | Posted on 2008-11-14 00:00:00 | by trouble | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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