My stomach twists in knotts
as I put the questions to the test.
When do we know it is time to let go?
Do we have unfinnished buisness?
Who will I leave behind and will they even care?
What is it that decides it is our time?
Are we lost and for that matter are we really ever found?
How do we define loss?
Loss implies that it was ours to begin with.
To have and to know implies that it is always there and that it cannot be changed into something we don't recognize.
I personally think that we never truely know what it is that we have untill it is gone.
Can you lose consiousness without being dead, of course not, it is just an altered state.
When we cut ourselves, our blood oxidizes and alters into another compound, but with time, is replaced in our body with the elemental constituants that form new blood cells from the foods we eat, the air we breathe,and the liquids we drink.
It is all to easy to define life in scientific terms for me, although the big questions still remain.
Where do we go?
When will we get there?
How long will it take?
What will it be like?
Why MUST we die?
Will we care that no one cares, or will we not care that someone does?
Will we even know that we are not as we were before, and will there be others like us or will we be alone?
All we can do in life is live it to it's fullest, and prepare for the inevitable end by living each day as if it were our last.
This is exactly what I plan on doing.
I can only hope that I will have a long enough life with the One I love, whom loves me so much in return.
These are the thoughts and questions that tie my Being in knotts!
I cannot go for I have to much to accomplish, and have not had but a cosmic instant in her arms and I cannot bare to leave her alone on this cold rock.
The only logical solution to this dilemma is to never die, so I guess I can't and won't!