Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Barcelonadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Civilian
    ASL Info:    21/M/Australia
    Elite Ratio:    7.14 - 146/166/35
    Words: 135
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 920
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 903



    Description:
       FYI:
    Catalonia- the autonomous province in Spain of which Barcelona is the capital.
    Gaudi- modernist architect, designed a lot of the famous buildings in the city
    Sangria- Spanish wine, with a very fruity flavour
    La Rambla- the main street in Barcelona

    This is an ode (of sorts) to Barcelona. I've just come back to the UK from a weekend away, and I've tried to capture the feelings I had towards the place.

    Seedy but stunning, it was an incredible 48 hours and I absolutely loved it, despite a friend having his camera stolen, having a guy attempt to pickpocket me and being completely surrounded by prostitutes and drug-peddlers walking down the main street. With Gaudi's architecture, unique history, culture and climate it's a truly amazing place.

    Any comments (especially suggestions as it has been thrown together a little) are appreciated.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBarcelonadots
    -------------------------------------------


    Full title: Barcelona, mi puta querida (Barcelona, my darling whore)

    I will always love you for it:
    the way you let your fringe spill
    over your eyes and onto your cheeks,
    like liquid sensuality.

    What clothes I remember were red:
    bold, but laces frayed from overuse
    and stained with the touch of neglect.
    I plunged under your skirt like a child,
    and found your legs wider than your smile.

    O sacred Catalonia!
    Gaudi’s towers, curling in my mind
    like a carnal temple of dreams.
    Your dreamy spires explode in the sky,
    leaving musty sheets and back-alley streets.

    My blood like sangria, I would
    wade again through your surf and shout
    to the thieves on La Rambla above:
    “Barcelona, your lies are enough:
    My darling whore, my faithless love”.




    Submitted on 2008-11-24 04:11:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Nice write, it really gave me a great picture of a city I've never been to, and I can really imagine it being just as you painted it. Great use of images and metaphors in this. Fave stanza:
    "I will always love you for it:
    the way you let your fringe spill
    over your eyes and onto your cheeks,
    like liquid sensuality."
    Just great imagery and use of words. And my fave lines were:
    "I plunged under your skirt like a child,
    and found your legs wider than your smile."
    Humorous and wonderfully descriptive. Very well done, and I can think of any thing else to add. Keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2008-11-28 00:00:00 | by bkj43 | [ Reply to This ]
      I just watched a show on Gaudi about two weeks ago. I found his architecture to be oddly different. As well, my reaction to it left me feeling like I was swimming underwater. It was intensely surreal.

    I find it interesting to refer to Barcelona as a whore. Which I imagine can mean a whole bunch of things.

    I don't know, there is something strangely beautiful about this piece that I can't quite put my finger on. But I like it. The thought of it and the descriptions you use to define your experience.

    I have never traveled far or wide. But I find when I have gotten out of my 20 mile radius, I much prefer to explore the heart of a place and its people. It is where you find the truth.
    | Posted on 2008-11-25 00:00:00 | by isabella | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    168275

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry