Why? I always ask myself this when I am in doubt, afraid, lonely depressed. There are so many things to ask about. Why do I ask myself why? To keep my brain ticking. To keep me sane.
Why am I in doubt? Why can't I trust their words? Why did I put so much trust in them? Why am I thinking bad of them? Why do I think they will betray me? Why did I forgive them despite what they did? Why can't I forgive such a simple thing? Why does it hurt? Why am I dwelling on this? Why can't I stop doubting?
Why am I afraid? Why am I cowering in fear? Why can't I face them? Why can't I stand up on my own? Why do I need others to be brave? Why can't I be brave? Why are they brave? Why am I hiding? Why am I running away? Why did it affect me that much? Why did I ask for help? Why didn't anyone help? Why can't I stop being afraid?
Why am I lonely? Why did everyone walk away from me? Why can't anyone stay? Why is it inevitable? Why was I forgotten? Why can't I forget them? Why are they stuck in my mind? Why can't they just leave me be? Why did they leave me like this? Why can I still hear them? Why can't they hear me? Why isn't anybody there? Why am I calling out? Why am I alone? Why can't someone be here with me?
Why am I depressed? Why am I frowning? Why can't I smile? Why are they smiling? Why are they so happy? Why can't I cheer up? Why am I so down? Why did I let this happen? Why did I put so much hope on it? Why did I get careless? Why was I a fool? Why didn't realize it? Why couldn't I make a better choice? Why does it always end up like this? Why do things happen to me? Why can't anything good happen to me? Why am I sad? Why can't I laugh it off?
Why do I exist? Is it to be acknowledged or acknowledge the existence of others? Why do I repeat my mistakes? Do I like getting hurt or do I just not learn? Why?