Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: truth revealeddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: marrymejuliet
    Elite Ratio:    3.04 - 22/15/19
    Words: 196
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 655
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1097



    Description:
       in response to "i always knew..." written by Demon_666


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotstruth revealeddots
    -------------------------------------------


    you say you care but dont show
    the love that i would need the most
    you ask what she has that you dont
    but this is the first we talked
    since we died inside
    i saw nothing that shows you care
    i wish you acted on how you felt
    since i have seen you fly in air
    your wings are seen only by me
    and you disagree with yourself
    but never would you even anger
    to show you cared about us
    maybe thats why i need someone else
    i tried my best to win your love
    but no matter whati did it wasnt enough
    so little credit for what i do
    half the time you dont know what it is i do for you
    when suspicion starts in your head
    throws suspicion on my bed
    i wish you knew how i felt
    but no sorrows greater then when we fell
    i asked you most these nights
    to come and save my life
    but nothing you showed looked like love
    i wish you would love with the action youve done
    death plays a beautiful hymn
    if only you tried to show your love for him




    Submitted on 2008-12-26 07:00:33     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      WOW! I like this alot! Thanks for taking the time to read mine let alone write a response!
    | Posted on 2008-12-26 00:00:00 | by Demon__666 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    169360

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Incubus written by monad
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Bond written by saartha
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    This written by Chelebel
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Linger written by saartha
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry