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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Unreachable Loverdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Aangskate
    ASL Info:    18/male
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 133/117/44
    Words: 39
    Class/Type: Haiku/Love
    Total Views: 975
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 313



    Description:
       A haiku I wrote about what tugs at my heart.
    The syllables are 5-7-5 in each stanza, or at leats should be. If there wrong, please tell me


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsUnreachable Loverdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Short, careful words hurt.
    Restrained, unloving- I'm sorry.
    No chance to tell you.

    Side glances exchanged.
    Love grows forever inside.
    It will last- will it?

    Beautiful in-out.
    Can they see? Let's hope their blind.
    Always, I promise.




    Submitted on 2009-01-05 17:56:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Not a bad poem It is really short sweet and to the point ...kinda got lost on the 5th line though wasnt sure where this was going maybe it is just me but I really do like this poem added it to my favorite...

    totojane
    | Posted on 2009-06-03 00:00:00 | by totojane03 | [ Reply to This ]
      It's ok but it's not really a haiku. A haiku is composed of only 3 lines not more. The haiku was the opening stanza of a form of Japanese poetry. But only the first stanza, the haiku, was written like that. If you feel like expanding it you should look into how the other stanzas were written, I cannot give you exact numbers right now...
    | Posted on 2009-01-06 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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