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    dots Submission Name: The Damning of Evedots

    Author: Syn
    Elite Ratio:    4.71 - 115/136/83
    Words: 160
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1007
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1224


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    dotsThe Damning of Evedots


    Dearest fair Lilith, impure and horned
    The same indeed we both have scorned
    For Adam, as well, did not intend to forsake
    But your luscious beauty were all it did take
    And what of Eve, who could not imagine such sinistry
    She got just one taste of you and abandoned her ministry

    Dominus Deus above, bearing good tidings and wrath
    And Malus Infernus below, with all his pitiful chained
    Together they attempted to divert us from this dire path
    Yet neither could keep us prisoner against the preordained

    So, with bells and umbrellas we skipped straight out of Eden
    Hand in hand now we stroll among the bruised and the beaten
    Too many souls perished when we were denounced as forbidden
    This shall be a lesson to learn not to believe what is written
    Now entangled in each other and quite merrily depraved
    Lilith and Eve cannot ever be saved...


    Submitted on 2009-01-09 04:37:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      coming back to this piece...

    i even like it better...really creative...

    and what great suggestion here...for forbidden fruit to eat...and more gardens to get kicked out of...
    | Posted on 2011-06-01 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      i saw what JenFlynn saw...

    thank you adam and eve for opening the gate and getting kicked out of eden...now we have life...good or bad..it is real...the garden was some figment of imagination of what perfect would be...but is perfect such a good thing...

    imperfections make us individuals...and life being imperfect makes the almost perfect times feel even better.

    and hooray for lilith and eve...if they are predisposed towards each other...sorry Adam, no more room in the pool for you buddy!

    i like the way the lines expanded in this..it was slipping through the little gate of eden and then expanding horizons...infinite possibilities so to speak.

    | Posted on 2011-04-04 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      I often wonder if Lilith, if she existed, was really all that evil for wanting to be "on top" once in a while and wanting to have a say in what happened to her. I can sympathize with her "uttering the ineffable name of God." Who doesn't get pissed off enough to curse that once in a while?

    I don't see her as evil. I see her as a strong-willed woman, perhaps a bit of a [censored] and perhaps not, who wanted life on her own terms.

    'Course, I don't even believe in the whole Creation story per se, so I'll shut my mouth now. Thought-provoking, as I'm sure you've seen.


    | Posted on 2009-11-23 00:00:00 | by Shadowstar13 | [ Reply to This ]
      I have an unusual interpretation of this: Eve and Lilith are lesbians. I understand it's not really that, and it's really about the temptation and evil taking Eve. But I couldn't help but feel that somehow, Lilith was personified through evil, as she is evil, leaving Adam behind in Eden, not having children. I found out recently she used to steal children since God damned her to be childless (or she couldn't pro-create).
    Did you use a certain form of poetry (ex: sonnet, sestina, etc) to write this?
    | Posted on 2009-11-22 00:00:00 | by JenFlynn | [ Reply to This ]

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