Greater than the two sums -------------------------------------------
My parents decided to multiply
They were imaginary numbers
X and Y
Mixed with other variables
Factored in the odds
A bizarre prime
I was raised
Things and people
Added and subtracted from my life
Taught never to be divisible
Taught never to settle for the mean
Taught to count exclusively on one
Trained to leave home
To see the world
To do great things
My parents want only for me to be the whole
Greater than the sum
Not a mistake
This is good also. I like some parts and some images. I don't like the form though. You need to have better discipline concerning the overall shape of the poem. Check this out, it's a poem of mine called mathematics2: http://www.eliteskills.com/z/40452 Just so you see how important form can be to a poem. Anyway you got something going here. I'll be keeping an eye on you.
HisNameIsNoNore took the thoughts I had and spit them out into a fine comment
HM-n-n-n-n-n-n, a chip from the old block huh!
I see you have responsible and loving parents who see that their failure to triumph in all has a blossom of hope in you to have a future in which all three of you can frolic. You made each line awesomely vivid as if creation were opening itself in revelation.
Interesting, I did like the flow of this poem. It had a sort of clockwork like rhythm, It seemed to play on the mind one line at a time, tick and tock, slowly it drained itself down to the point that the person is greater than that of what is expected of you, that you will ascend above it all. Through the guidence of that steady hand, you will be greater than yourself.
I just liked the flow a lot, I think it was well crafted and a solid piece of good poetry.