Waiting by saartha

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: Waiting dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	saartha
ASL Info:	20/F/US
Elite Ratio:	4.52 - 172/247/87
Words:	41

Class/Type:	Poetry/Misc
Total Views:	120
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	291

Description:
...I don't even like geology, why the hell am I writing poetry about the carbon cycle? (not really about the carbon cycle, but with an aspect of it yeah whatever you get it).

This is about love of any type. The full title may be 'Waiting for when Solitude Spontaneously Gives Birth'

Waiting

-------------------------------------------

In much the same way
as ice floes stall and
hopeful bits of carbon float
suspended,

I am twitching, slightly, hundred-fingered
and hundred-eyed and all of me breathless
for a time when my chest beats not one-one,
but one-two, one-two.

Submitted on 2009-01-15 22:18:58 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  as long and tired as the hundred year oak. perfectly beautiful writing.
| Posted on 2009-04-16 00:00:00 | by blackbird | [ Reply to This ]
  i love your work too.

'hopeful bits of carbon' is just a great thought.

i love the play with 'hundred-fingered' and
'hundred-eyed'.
the whole second part of this piece is very lyrical to me.

as well, this could be waiting for anything.
small. large. that something that makes the difference.

you really are a wonderful poet. thanks.
| Posted on 2009-01-18 00:00:00 | by isabella | [ Reply to This ]
  symbiotic tendrils of osmosis quiver
like a dozen love arrows shot through the liver

gather now as the soft hearts dance
to rhythms of a fine romance

boom-a-boom-a-boom
boom-a-boom-a-boom
I think I hear the drum

boom-a-boom-a-boom
boom-a-boom-a-boom
your turn to dance will come

~that last part is a song I heard long ago~
| Posted on 2009-01-16 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
  I love your work... I feel like I read something from you of the same title, though... or maybe it was a different poet...

Anyways, we all are waiting for that, I think. Well I'll say lots of people I know, then, hehe. Each expectantly waiting for our own Big Bang to happen... (hehe, not in that way =P) But, we wait for something to shock and open up a new world for us. Pull us from our own I guess... or else make ours bigger and brighter...

Ah, I ramble... I love the last two lines the best...

~Azura*
| Posted on 2009-01-15 00:00:00 | by EmpathicAya | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

170106

Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

[ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
[ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]