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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: DEMOTIONdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: mae
    Elite Ratio:    5.97 - 596/642/259
    Words: 67
    Class/Type: Poetry/Comedy
    Total Views: 96
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 535



    Description:
       Not really comedy, just humor.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDEMOTIONdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Alas, poor Pluto,
    his status gone,
    as a full-fledged member
    of this nonagon.

    His orbit's not his,
    or so they say.
    It's Neptune's really.
    He's just in the way.

    He's now called "dwarf"
    though his size hasn't changed.
    It's just his place
    in line's rearranged.

    But I doubt he cares
    or maybe even knows.
    He's frozen you see,
    right down to his toes.




    Submitted on 2009-01-26 06:51:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Well, I have to say I found this quite amusing!

    Nice little rhyme, I like stuff like this.

    The only very small criticism I have would be I thought "He's frozen you know" wasn't a good line to follow "or maybe even knows". How about "He's frozen, of course"?

    Anyway, enjoyed your latest submission - short and simple!

    Alex
    | Posted on 2009-01-26 00:00:00 | by alexboy | [ Reply to This ]
      .....oh ok you're right about the not comedy part

    it was quirky, fun with it's simplicity, and right about where it should be in ryme scheme. reminds me of a news reporter in pittsburgh. it's fun to make little rymes about the trivial stuff

    It's just his place
    in line's rearranged.
    that line is actually pretty witty and stands out to me. very observational, in that yeah, idk i guess i'd agree, all it really is, they changed the classification.

    naice work, enjoyable read, not much to dig into, but written well for it's type of poem.

    | Posted on 2009-01-26 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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