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Roleplay | Viral news today | Music Theory

DEMOTION


Author: mae
Elite Ratio:    5.96 - 597 /644 /262
Words: 67
Class/Type: Poetry /Comedy
Total Views: 1145
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 535



Description:

Not really comedy, just humor.


DEMOTION


Alas, poor Pluto,
his status gone,
as a full-fledged member
of this nonagon.

His orbit's not his,
or so they say.
It's Neptune's really.
He's just in the way.

He's now called "dwarf"
though his size hasn't changed.
It's just his place
in line's rearranged.

But I doubt he cares
or maybe even knows.
He's frozen you see,
right down to his toes.




Submitted on 2009-01-26 06:51:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
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Comments


  Well, I have to say I found this quite amusing!

Nice little rhyme, I like stuff like this.

The only very small criticism I have would be I thought "He's frozen you know" wasn't a good line to follow "or maybe even knows". How about "He's frozen, of course"?

Anyway, enjoyed your latest submission - short and simple!

Alex
| Posted on 2009-01-26 00:00:00 | by alexboy | [ Reply to This ]
  .....oh ok you're right about the not comedy part

it was quirky, fun with it's simplicity, and right about where it should be in ryme scheme. reminds me of a news reporter in pittsburgh. it's fun to make little rymes about the trivial stuff

It's just his place
in line's rearranged.
that line is actually pretty witty and stands out to me. very observational, in that yeah, idk i guess i'd agree, all it really is, they changed the classification.

naice work, enjoyable read, not much to dig into, but written well for it's type of poem.

| Posted on 2009-01-26 00:00:00 | by cornonthekob | [ Reply to This ]


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