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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Aangskate
    ASL Info:    18/male
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 133/117/44
    Words: 145
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 672
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 849



    Description:
       A poem I wrote as a present of sorts for a one year anniversarry that became 13 months just yesterdsay I love you babe


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYoudots
    -------------------------------------------


    You are the hand that keeps my heart beating.
    You are the bandage that stops my bleeding.
    You are the enchanter who holds me under your spell.
    You are the comforting arm that keeps me still.
    You are the blanket that keeps me warm at night.
    You are the lantern, my very own light.

    Canít you see that you are all I need?
    How can I describe the way you make me feel?
    Another day without you is another day wasted.
    Now and forever, I will always love you.
    Do you miss me? My heart aches every second weíre apart.
    Love is a complicated thing, something I can only achieve with you.
    Everyone says we are better alone, Iím nothing without you.
    Remember me always, because Iím not letting go.

    I love you.
    Do you love me too?




    Submitted on 2009-01-28 17:30:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Ahh... I say this is like a classic, no, yeah, better than that poem I heard
    um.... can't remember... to long ago...
    But I know this one is better
    A true show of love and compassion twards umm.. I don't need to know
    | Posted on 2009-12-28 00:00:00 | by 13thprotector | [ Reply to This ]
      I don't know how to respond to this piece. It wasn't your best but it was still good. I could pick up on some of your feelings. I have close to the same problem...he just doesn't know just how much I care for him. He is like a brother to me I don't like him any more than a close friend. How do you tell someone that they mean alot to you without conveying the wrong idea? Sorry I was just thinking and typing and I'm too lazy to delete it.
    | Posted on 2009-01-31 00:00:00 | by Coripa | [ Reply to This ]
      I love you babe. You know that. Thanks for the present! :P SOrry it took so long to respond, my power is out. I like the part about me being your blanket, its sweet that you put that in there. its a beautiful poem :)
    | Posted on 2009-01-30 00:00:00 | by dthforeverpain8 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a sweet little read. It makes me all cheery inside.

    I don't really know how to give any constructive criticism...

    Maybe only one suggestion: you repeated "you are [insert positive metaphor]" Maybe you should repeat "I am [insert positive metaphor]" of what you are to your significant other?

    That's really the only thing I could think of.

    Any way, congrats on the relationship and I wish you two luck.
    | Posted on 2009-01-29 00:00:00 | by dear | [ Reply to This ]


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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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