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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: This Contagious Sindots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: 777sacrites777
    ASL Info:    24/F/TX
    Elite Ratio:    3.06 - 343/189/83
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/Cutting or Mutilation
    Total Views: 1031
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 727



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThis Contagious Sindots
    -------------------------------------------


    This obession with pain
    is my one true drive
    that makes life feel real,
    so I know I'm alive.

    When things feel trippy,
    like it's all just a dream,
    when I want to pull out my hair,
    when I want to scream

    I just reach for the razor
    and freedom it brings.
    This salvation is brought
    on hell-sent wings.

    And soon it's washed away
    as reality sets in.
    I sit back and observe
    this masterpiece carved upon my skin.

    I can't tell you what it is,
    why I do this over again.
    For it's far beyond MY knowledge
    why I've caught this contagious sin.




    Submitted on 2009-02-01 20:47:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Im not going to bash your poem, because its about cutting, I went through all that stuff too.
    But I would like to stay that it is a very steriotypical angst poem. Stanzas and clear cut rhyme. Angst and anger, cutting and mutilation.
    I have hope for you though. Try to branch out in writing, try free verse instead of stanzas, maybe even forget rhyme. You have potential. I only urge you to try. If you are comfortable withyour writing though, you do not have to take my advise, it is an opinion, very freely given. I hope I havent taken up too much of you time babling. Good luck in the future!

    ~Channie
    | Posted on 2009-02-02 00:00:00 | by dthforeverpain8 | [ Reply to This ]


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