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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: fleets of timedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Jimi James
    ASL Info:    24/m/somehwere
    Elite Ratio:    6.16 - 90/78/41
    Words: 102
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 686
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 722



    Description:
       "We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; For he to-day that sheds his blood with me Shall be my brother"
    why tide? why time? time has no brothers
    ...
    please bash my poem. criticize in the most offensive way. serious.ly.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsfleets of timedots
    -------------------------------------------


    spring commencing
    more than just for one hand
    i held two
    but not for much longer

    thought of the snow
    that changes hue
    and sleeps
    and swallows
    all that reminds of earth
    all that reminds of birth
    are there weeds
    are there blessings
    the final day
    keeps no final say


    spring commencing
    lost then just one brother
    i see a band of steps
    oh give back that nice feeling
    someone was steeling

    thought of medals
    mused of crowns
    the history of believe
    and the history of bye
    submit the clock
    for the oh hated rye
    pass again time




    Submitted on 2009-02-02 22:40:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      A drink to the auld lang syne... however it is spelled. A very moving piece you have here... It reminds me of our dirty little war and our dead little soldiers, and the outlook of someone who's in line to be another one. It's profound in the use of the seasons and spring, the "commencing" (military flair in that)... You write beautifully.
    | Posted on 2009-02-03 00:00:00 | by SmokinG | [ Reply to This ]


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