Description: Something I just started writing. I did it in a style much different then my own, something I find happens often in older works like Dante’s “The Divine Comedy” except I added my own flair.
I love it. The broken rhythm is just perfect for my mood. It's like barbed wire around the neck. I just posted a poem that has a similar rhythm "Orchid Mantis", yet lacks the beautiful form. Keep writing!
Very, very morbid. Of course, it helps that I hold a certain fascination for all things morbid and dark in poetry, and this fits the bill.
I agree that this one is old fashioned, because honestly I kept feeling like I was in the 1700 or 1800's when I was reading it, but that is a good thing. The voice you used in this poem was very unique and it really is different than anything I've ever read by you.
I'm not sure as to how it will relate to other readers, but I found that it related to me in a rather strange way because it's almost as if I've experienced this emotion before. The emotion I feel is something of a combination of undying love and just overally morbid, gothic darkness. Of course, the last lines refer to being alone and feeling dead, and I have also felt that. Overall this is a very different poem, and I really like it. It is a classic gothic poem.