It's true. Everyone likes to think of themselves as unique creatures with unique experiences, but at the center were all pretty much the same. I think that this poem built up nicely to the send off. If I had to make one suggestion would be to maybe (up to you, of course) expand on some of the thoughts that you made. Like the line about people being battered and broken could be expanded into why or from what are they battered and broken from. Just a thought.