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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Boredom sets indots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Plegias
    ASL Info:    17/ male/ my house
    Elite Ratio:    3.25 - 37/23/40
    Words: 104
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 579
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 626



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBoredom sets indots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm at the computer, it's where I can write,
    Where I am not trudged upon or in sight.
    Soon I'm gone and words are in my head,
    Boredom takes its place, wanting to be read.

    Out of sight and out of mind, I begin to write,
    Surprised by anything like oncomming light.
    I write it down, make it form words,
    I forget all about those nasty bores.

    It just keeps comming, I don't want to stop,
    But I must, I do, or I just won't stop.
    Now I leave this poem to you,
    so when you're bored, you'll know what to do.




    Submitted on 2009-03-07 18:32:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      Its really comical and rhythmic which i like. it really capture your attention and i would like to say that you dont always have to rhyme each line not that i dont like you did that but dont feel like you need to rhyme. Theres a couple of spelling mistakes such as comming =coming and upcomming=upcoming
    Also another tip i would like to impart is that when you write something even a simple concept as boredom try to stretch its meaning and dimensions into something totally unrelated. it really keeps the readers glued onto your piece and wanting more:)
    I really like the part where you say Boredom takes its place, wanting to be read".
    Hope that helps and happy writing!
    | Posted on 2009-03-08 00:00:00 | by sophisticatedme | [ Reply to This ]


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