If I could only write a note and
Tie it to a pigeon,
Send it out the window
With my love secured in ribbon -
Through the skies and 'midst the trees,
I would share my secret
With the Sun and with the Moon
So we could slumber 'neath it.
And all the cares of all the world
Would promptly dissipate
And we would smile all the while
As we disintegrate.
Your descriptions rock!
Always precious, a good in the beginning bliss love poem.
They seem to carry so much mystical wonderment of a fluttery heart and uplifted, light soul.
I'm not able to critique a darn thing for you so these are all just thoughts and comments.
|| Posted on 2014-06-03 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ] || Haha, should I be laughing? Terribly morbid but starts too happy for me not to think it's funny.|
To tell you the truth, I only opened this link to read it because it was one of the only poems in the front page with PROPER CAPITALIZATION.
Geez - I mean props to you for understanding, but people got to learn how to capitalize titles. I'm not perfect but presentation is everything.
I digress, my initial thought after reading the first line was meh. This will probably an Ok poem. but I fell in love with ribbon line. And the fact that you left out an article (of speech) making it kind of a cutesy line.
It souned almost like a little girl talking about her love in the second stanza which made me smile. And the idea of sending love through carrier pigeons is a pleasant idea and pretty creative. Then you just throw a big, flaming meteor at it with the very last line. Nice touch.
Very Entertaining! :)
|| Posted on 2009-03-15 00:00:00 | by Indelible_ink | [ Reply to This ] |