I feel more like a Skeleton When...

Author: Jazzy ASL Info:    20/f/USA Elite Ratio:    3.89 - 90 /221 /227 Words: 122

Class/Type: Poetry /Misc Total Views: 822 Average Vote:    4.0000 Bytes: 755

Description:

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I feel more like a Skeleton When...

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I feel more like a skeleton when I crack my jaw at night. I can see in my head a white skull Cracking his jaw as well. Then he'll stare back at me, And we'll both wonder. I feel more like a skeleton when I sway my hips on my way around The block every afternoon. I can see the x-ray image of hip bones Thigh bones, pelvic bones grinding together As they shimmy down the street. I feel more like a skeleton when I'm in the grocery store Reaching up to the top shelf. I can see that skeleton straining, Stretching out to his very limits Pale bones dull in the florescent lighting.

Submitted on 2009-03-20 01:00:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

I'm new to Elite Skills, so I don't know if Ive read, or posted anything on yours before, so here goes. You have an unusual ability to see into your body/skeleton such as I never had. Your write is thought provoking and interesting. Also, you have a natural non-formal rhythm which one has to become used to get the swing of it. My advice is to always aim at improving your rhythm, which is a necessity for poetry. Rhyming does not, on its own, a poem make, but rhythm does! Ted.

| Posted on 2009-03-20 00:00:00 | by edcherry | [ Reply to This ]

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