Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Motel Lonelydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Toosha
    ASL Info:    18/f/SD
    Elite Ratio:    1.84 - 20/13/11
    Words: 141
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 455
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 931



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMotel Lonelydots
    -------------------------------------------


    No one has stayed there for more than one night
    Not for years
    Yes, visitors come for a short while
    Then, leave
    Why won't anyone stay?
    More advertisements need to be put out
    Less clothes
    More makeup
    Her body is like a Motel
    Every night that a visitor arrives
    She hopes


    But not tonight
    He's gone before she could even catch his name
    She sits alone, crying once more
    Her life is now starting to fall into a routine
    She goes to the mirror, seeking help
    To tell her the flaws and mistakes she owns
    She stares into the mirror, gazing into those big, blue, once gorgeous eyes,
    Now vacant

    Looks like no one's home
    She lost herself looking for someone
    Looking for herself
    She lost herself
    And she doesn't know how far off she has ran.




    Submitted on 2009-04-02 11:36:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      very mystic , good imagination , keeps you puzzling , bringing a whole new chapter about staying at a motel, keep writing , who is this lady at the motel?
    | Posted on 2009-04-02 00:00:00 | by JoJoCrab | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    172844

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Dream written by closetpoet
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Carry written by saartha
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    The World written by jjd
    Shi written by ShyOne

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry