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    dots Submission Name: Pool of Darknessdots

    Author: wolfgurl830
    ASL Info:    18/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    0.96 - 42/38/34
    Words: 117
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 779
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 700


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    dotsPool of Darknessdots

    I almost drowned in my depression
    With only my head above water
    But I survived because I have too
    Cause suicide couldnít be the answer
    But like a snake itís trying to wriggle its way back
    Iím trying to suppress sometimes pieces of it come
    But I push back
    I canít do this forever
    What if I get pushed to far
    And I drown in my darkness
    And only my hand sticks out trying to grab something
    And suicide is then my final answer
    What if I fail at surprising it
    I fail then at my life
    Cause I canít find a branch to hold on too
    I then slide into its darkness
    And disappear

    Submitted on 2009-04-15 14:21:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Kill someone else if you must, you are a poet and we need you!
    | Posted on 2009-09-17 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      I read this because of your other stuff. I just can't get into the suicide crap, not when you've lived under as many bridges as I have, but because it was poetic. There is a book in the bible, (I ain't no bible thumper but I read everything I can get my hands on) Eclesiatise (sp), I think, chapter 9 or 10 verse 11. It talks about races not won by the swift, battles not won by the best general, that chance and timing happen to us all, you know, "right place at the right time". Forget any preconceived idea of what life should be, forget any idea of the way things should turn out, don't believe fairy tail BS. It's all on you. Hey, you want to know how you've been lied too? Read Ben Franklin's autobiography. We're all being jacked around. Things aren't like our founders meant them to be. But you know what, they're better than a lot of other places and you can make things happen.

    Many happy keystrokes and all things shinny.
    | Posted on 2009-04-15 00:00:00 | by nsc | [ Reply to This ]
      I like it. It shows true emotion. But you should add in puncuation to make it clearer. Also, in the third line "too" should be "to."
    | Posted on 2009-04-15 00:00:00 | by Midorininja | [ Reply to This ]

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