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looking east

Author: meoww
Elite Ratio:    6.75 - 262 /258 /143
Words: 1
Class/Type: Misc /Misc
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i find the use of white space to be fascinating: reduced syntax and punctuation, etc... yep.

a train through eastern europe would be ideal right about now...

looking east

Submitted on 2009-04-16 08:34:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  What can I say? Your poem has actually left me a little speechless. It is not only a good poem, it is an original and unique one too! You definately have talent.
| Posted on 2009-04-20 00:00:00 | by Mimevas Lemqi | [ Reply to This ]
  my daughter likes this one. perhaps because she has been fortunate (because she has a very kind mother!) to journey on that train when she was 16 and again at 18.....and experience those miles across eastern european landscapes..... she now keeps returning to Prague with different friends and declares it to be her favourite city.

i enjoyed being on the streets of vienna (although we were just enroute to austria to ski ....and i did have 69 kids with me, and while i was pleased that none were particularly interested in the von trapp family, so i did not have to suffer 'the lonely goatherd', they were all plugged into their ipods and playing on their electronic games, showing no interest at all in the city of amazing classical music!)

i enjoyed the 'turning pages under water' because reading a book used to be the only way to decompress after a deep dive without going totally nuts.
in the UK we can usually only see just past the end of our noses so we could not enjoy the marine life or the brilliant light effects playing through the water. so page turning became a matter of course.

i am back to school on monday ... though on monday night, i am driving north to see one of your country men (aaron mauger) performing in a group to raise money for a lad that is paralysed from the neck down. i shall be stupidly tired for the kids on tuesday but at times you have to do silly things.

back to your poetry. i like your 'era of spaces', it looks effective. i wonder what your next 'period' will be. you continue to arrange words for us to enjoy..whatever!

i liked how you finished this piece. i felt that i could hear your breath out. almost like a soft sigh.

finally. i enjoyed the clip in your journal; visually and musically. i hope they were good when you went to see them.


| Posted on 2009-04-18 00:00:00 | by Alter idem | [ Reply to This ]
  you always write so beautifully. i am sorry that i don't show appreciation more often, but it is that i expect excellence and "heart" and all that holds beauty from your words and am never disappointed.

it is more about me, and whether i think i can add value to you!

you know i love you thoughts j. they comfort me on a deep level and i am honoured to be here, reading this...

| Posted on 2009-04-18 00:00:00 | by biska | [ Reply to This ]
  I believe I said a few words on this when it was a journal piece...let me say again how I love the grubby, smudged affect that gives it the feeling of dream and memory, trains etc.

I love the format, you could almost make 3 4 or 5 poems of it because of the way it is together and apart.
| Posted on 2009-04-17 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]
  gorgeous piece. you took me places.
| Posted on 2009-04-16 00:00:00 | by blackbird | [ Reply to This ]
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| Posted on 2009-04-16 00:00:00 | by youbo1 | [ Reply to This ]

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