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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Waiting for dawndots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Mithrandir
    ASL Info:    28/m/N.Y.
    Elite Ratio:    4.62 - 452/681/113
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 687
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 776



    Description:
       This is about the most intriguing, captivating, frightening, and beautiful woman I have ever met in my life. Though in the end of my attempted pursuit, I would change nothing. This is also a glimspe of the hopeless romantic in me.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWaiting for dawndots
    -------------------------------------------


    I know you’ve
    Been looking through
    Your stained glass eyes

    You see the world
    In such a different light
    So many images I
    Could never comprehend

    What is it you see
    When you turn your
    Gaze in my direction

    Can you make out
    The features of my face
    Or am I simply
    A shadow in the background

    Someone stuck
    In twilight between night and day
    Simply waiting for sunrise

    Would you let me look
    Through those stained
    Glass eyes

    Would you let me
    Learn of those
    Things within

    Because I have
    Been waiting for you
    Always waiting
    for sunrise




    Submitted on 2004-07-15 10:32:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      one of the saddest things in the world is that sometimes you like someone and that person just doesn't feel the same about you... i think this captures it all...

    my favourite lines (which i thought were awesome)
    "Can you make out
    The features of my face
    Or am I simply
    A shadow in the background

    Someone stuck
    In twilight between night and day
    Simply waiting for sunrise"
    | Posted on 2004-07-20 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]
      i like the comparasion of stained glass eyes to her seeing the world diffrent than most people ...hmmm...i really have no complaints i like it just like it is...smiles ange
    | Posted on 2004-07-15 00:00:00 | by purplesun24 | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont know why but after i read your description i thought that 'dawn' was a metaphor for the woman you were writing about... and what more intriguing or majestic image to represent a woman but the sun rising into the sky.. especially one who is out of your reach..

    and your use of imagery is lovely.. 'stained glass eyes' and 'Someone stuck / In twilight between night and day"

    my only suggestion for flow would be not to capitalise the first letter of each sentence.. although i know some people tend to do this on purpose.. but since you've chosen not to use any punctuation.. i'm assuming it wasnt intentional..?

    anyway.. beautiful poem
    | Posted on 2004-07-19 00:00:00 | by girlinthephoto | [ Reply to This ]


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