[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: The smiling of the dyingdots

    Author: Peacejoe
    Elite Ratio:    2.89 - 30/29/23
    Words: 162
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 528
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1020

       I'm probably going to edit this later, just needed to save it

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe smiling of the dyingdots

    Looking at it all play out in silence.
    Everyone smiling in the isle,
    Whenever she talks.
    But not the smiling of the happy,
    The smiling of the dying.
    And at the end of the day,
    They’ll run her out of school,
    And she won’t come back until the next day.

    When something is done to prevent it,
    By no one but myself,
    It turns to me to try and fix,
    Her ‘problem’
    And I tell my teachers,
    Every one.
    The ones who do nothing,
    In the face of all they believe in,
    Only stopping once a while,
    To hate her as well.

    And then one day, she doesn’t come back,
    And no one knows where she’s gone.
    Everyone walks the halls smiling,
    The smiling of the dying,
    Knowing that she is dead,
    And gone,
    No one cares,
    It’s what they wanted all along.
    And I am the only one who will never sleep with rest again.

    Submitted on 2009-04-24 08:29:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      i really understood this one, i got a clear picture in my head. veddi nice
    | Posted on 2009-10-05 00:00:00 | by littlemisskitte | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Whispered written by endlessgame23
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]