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    dots Submission Name: She was heredots

    Author: PiperH
    ASL Info:    17, F, Georgia
    Elite Ratio:    3.89 - 253/299/172
    Words: 158
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 742
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 993


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    dotsShe was heredots

    She was here...yesterday
    I can remember the sound of her voice
    I would give anything to hear it again
    I would give anything if I had the choice
    She was here, two months ago
    it doesn't seem like it's been that long
    I still feel the tears flooding my eyes
    when somebody asks me what's wrong
    She was here, almost a year ago
    I keep acting like I am fine
    imagining that she's in the other room
    and that she's been here all this time
    She was here, two years ago
    her ashes are in my hands
    I throw them into the ocean
    my legs are wobbling as i stand
    She was here, once before
    I can almost feel her beside me
    The tornado has long since gone
    But I'm still standing in debris
    Remembering all the moments
    the days and years she thrived
    She was here, my mother
    She was here, she was alive...

    Submitted on 2009-04-24 19:45:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I agree with Ted, but also disagree. Yes, it's sad, but it's also good to remember ya know? And by writing this poem, you are remembering your mother, and making sure that you'll never forget, not to say that that will so easily happen. I liked the way you started with the present and then worked up to a longer amount of time. And the rhyming, well i thought it was well incorporated, so much so that i didn't really notice it until the end. ^_^ It was a beautiful poem written with love, and i deeply enjoyed it. peace and inspiration!

    | Posted on 2009-04-24 00:00:00 | by Draumrkopa | [ Reply to This ]
      This is one very sad poem, --- I feel your pain and loss plainly. Barring our own premature death, each one of us has to suffer the loss of our mother. Knowledge of that, nor anything else can soften that blow. Time may heal, but one never forgets. Ted.
    | Posted on 2009-04-24 00:00:00 | by edcherry | [ Reply to This ]

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