I love the Sound of Thunder by bluecrane

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: I love the Sound of Thunder dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	bluecrane
ASL Info:	19/F/WASHINGTON
Elite Ratio:	3.61 - 70/83/26
Words:	105

Class/Type:	Misc/Misc
Total Views:	796
Average Vote:	5.0000
Bytes:	621

Description:

I love the Sound of Thunder dots

-------------------------------------------

I hear the wind cry from the west
A blanket of darkness covers the sky
I know this feeling better than best
The lightning flashes bright in my eyes

I love the sound of thunder

I feel the road beneath the wheels
I drive for miles in the dark
The windows are down, the chill I can feel
I hear the rumble of my car

I love the sound of thunder

The air is still, as still can be
I'm laying in your arms
I hear the pounding melody
The beating of your heart

I love the sound of thunder

Submitted on 2009-04-29 01:03:42 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
So do I, its fantastic. I like this, its simple and beautiful. Your constant us of simple verbs like "I hear" "I feel" is effective particularly "I feel the road beneath the wheels". If I may make a few suggestions;

The air is still, as still can be
We promise not to part
I hear the pounding melody
The beating of your heart

Strictly if this is a vivid fantasy and nothing real or personal to you

I feel the road beneath the wheels
I drive miles throughout the dark
The windows down, that chilly feel
The stark rumbling of my car

Again they're just suggestions
Nicely done!

- Sethesin
| Posted on 2009-04-29 00:00:00 | by Sethesin | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

173799

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.
untitled written by Chelebel
Wasps written by Wolfwatching
It's Night Now written by RisingSon
cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
Once Again written by krs3332003
Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
Wish written by Daniel Barlow
Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
Linger written by saartha
Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
What happens written by Wolfwatching
Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
Song written by Daniel Barlow
Trails written by Daniel Barlow
To Glow written by krs3332003
Giving written by jjd
Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
The Promise written by annie0888
To written by SavedDragon
The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
This written by Chelebel
I will call out your name written by RisingSon
Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
Cage written by distortedcloud

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.