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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Butterflydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Texan_Poet
    ASL Info:    20/F/daydreaming
    Elite Ratio:    5.7 - 127/123/48
    Words: 87
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Serious
    Total Views: 411
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 671



    Description:
       This came out randomly. No clue from where. Just following a thought pattern. I may do some revision, but for now. Meh, it will do.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsButterflydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Gentle sweep of wings,
    A shout of color,
    Bold and bright,
    But...
    Darker colors too.
    Hidden,
    Behind the brightest.

    Millions, thousands,
    Unique, yet all the same.
    Classified, catogorized.
    Put into a neat little box
    That we can 'understand'

    Flitting from one thing to another,
    Trying only to survive?
    Or understand how to live?
    A splash of lively color,
    There and gone,
    Dead in a split second.
    So small, so fragile.
    So easily destroyed.

    How much do we have in common
    With the common butterfly?




    Submitted on 2009-05-01 13:05:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    ||| Comments |||
      interesting analogy...

    we hide behind the flash...but inside we feel dark thoughts...we hide dark personalities behind the beauty of the butterfly..

    our wings can be used to fly to bad places in our heart...and to destroy other hearts.

    so that is why butterflies are often chloroformed and then pinned to boards for display...

    what if our hearts were?

    what would those looking at the collection think--
    i see random thoughts...and poems spilled out on paper are often really the best, most natural stuff we might produce...
    i do believe in revision at times...but sometimes we might kill a poem and pin it to a board and make it stiff and dead with too much chloroform...just thoughts..

    like the feel of this

    jacob
    | Posted on 2011-07-06 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      pretty good for random thoughts but i'm not sure it makes the leap into all that it could be.

    i think it's a life poem as much as a poem about a flutterly, and so there's something to be said for working that duality and smudging lines.

    I'll take a shot at a section or two.

    The gentle sweep of wings,
    A shout of color,
    Bold and bright,
    But...
    Dimmer colors, too.
    Shades of dark,
    Behind the light.


    Millions, thousandths,
    Square-roots become the same.
    Classifieds, categorized.
    Stacked then, in a box
    We label 'I can understand'

    May not fit your vision but the point is really that a poem can be many shades at once, and strike the reader as so-- and as so on many different days.

    DB

    | Posted on 2009-05-01 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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