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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: "If Only Hearts Were That Simple"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: AeThe Lost Poet
    ASL Info:    19/M/DE
    Elite Ratio:    3.6 - 147/184/122
    Words: 189
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 864
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1118



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots"If Only Hearts Were That Simple"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    In everything, there is tears
    no sorrow is untold
    but my fears are less simple
    as the plot unfolds:

    the clock ticks
    the watch slips of the cocked wrist
    pointed heavy, the pun
    load and lock this
    spotless bullet of words
    she revealed to me
    even more the absurd
    they appealed to me
    even more than the hurt
    that i wrote with the pen
    my heart was soaked
    in a load of pretend
    when i wrote
    i devoted the pen
    when i spoke
    i denoted the when
    where and how,
    but was slow to defend
    my own actions-
    know the intent
    to preserve her own dignity
    know she's a friend

    ---*or even better yet, was*---

    and if only hearts were that simple
    and mine were unbound
    i was waiting for a "thank you"
    but didn't hear a sound
    if only hearts were that simple
    so i took the blame
    made myself look bad
    so she wouldn't look the same.....




    Submitted on 2009-05-04 10:47:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Ah AE i like it. you can see the speaker wearing his heart on his sleeve but trying to just nod goodbye to her as she gives him "lets be freinds" speech and breaks his heart. your rhyming was nice as usual. in some places it felt a little drawn out but it was very enjoyable to read.

    (thanks for you kind words on my little poem Backing Up, I like being called a genious)

    thank you for the great write!

    Ash
    | Posted on 2009-12-12 00:00:00 | by SincerWritinAsh | [ Reply to This ]


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