I am so.... scared and frustrated! I have to wonder sometimes if I am doing this right. Am I the mother I am supposed to be, am I teaching them about the rights and wrongs the right way. I am frustrated to see them sad, without, and struggling to fit in or to find themselves. Yet I get such joy out of everything that they have accomplished in life so far and look forward to all that they do in the future. I hope that all their dreams are fulfilled and they are given a better start than what I had.
I am scared that I am too harsh on my kids, and all the same I am afraid that I give them to much freedom. I try to be the best that I can to them, but is it enough. Or am I just scared that I am losing my grip on them that they are growing up and I do not want to let them go.
I wish it were easy as reading a book to figure the whole raising kids, teens mostly. I wish that I were given the opportunity to learn from my mother, or to have her to ask questions or get advice from. I am missing that a great deal. I guess I have to go off my motherly instinct for the most part.
I just pray that the next 8 to 10 years go by with out too much worries or mishaps. I pray that my boys learn to be respectful and cautious with he girls and the girls the same and learn their boundaries. I pray that the Lord watches them and guides them in the right paths in life. Most of all I pray that the Lord spares me from my past and does not allow it to come back to haunt me, this coming from the old saying from everyone's parents.... what comes around goes around, you will pay for this when you have kids of your own.
I just want my kids to know that I love them and everything I do is for them. They are my world and my best friends.