Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: If your soul was a pitcher...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: coloredstone
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 99/60/37
    Words: 142
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Misc
    Total Views: 620
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 856



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIf your soul was a pitcher...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    There’s nothing that holds as many secrets

    As a human soul…

    Just imagine

    if your soul was a pitcher

    what would it pour?

    What would you do if your life could talk

    And tell your story

    like a chapter from a history?

    lives don't lie like you and me

    what would your life say to you

    if it could speak?

    What if your talking life appeared before you

    and everyone you know

    and everyone you don’t

    and before your Lord?

    You knew He knew,

    but somehow you didn’t really think…

    My friend, just because life isn't talking to you right now

    doesn’t mean it never will.




    Submitted on 2009-05-07 07:54:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I liked this. I thought about that, and if my life was the water in the pitcher, I guess I would swallow it all as fast as I could so nobody can see it... if it were the pitcher itself? Put it in a box and bury it, I suppose. I think I must be here waiting on the next one. This one? It's become like some rest stop along the way.

    I think this was creative... If I were easily inspired, I would say inspirational even... it's not a word I use often, but I can see where it would apply. Nice.
    | Posted on 2010-01-13 00:00:00 | by Runes | [ Reply to This ]
      hey guess what i learned yesterday. man inherently forgets, we get from our father. so we forget about the last baseball game, so treatment for that is to be with ppl who remind of the baseball game.

    nice write stone.
    | Posted on 2009-06-03 00:00:00 | by geekyslacker | [ Reply to This ]
      Ah. Wonderful, though i do agree a tad bit with Keiran. you should add a little ambiguity. but i still love it.

    It scares to think of what life will say. someimes we do and say things that we dont mean and then just try to forget it, but life doesnt forget it.

    "My friend, just because life isn't talking to you right now

    doesn’t mean it never will. "

    I love it when people put the whole "my friend".

    Fana
    | Posted on 2009-05-08 00:00:00 | by BusterLILblock | [ Reply to This ]
      I'll be honest, I didn't like it. BUT, before you ignore me, let me clarify.

    I liked the meaning, I liked what you were trying to say, I just didn't like how you said it.

    It's too clear, you can't just come out and say things in poetry! Well, sometimes you can pull it off, but mostly, it's better to use metaphor, allegory, or another fitting literary tool. Hide the meaning/idea/emotion/message in something else.

    So, maybe try again with this piece, and express the idea with less words, more images, more emotions, more subtlety.
    | Posted on 2009-05-08 00:00:00 | by Keiran | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    174094

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Don't Stop written by poetotoe
    Desert written by lori_tab
    The Supreme Court written by poetotoe
    All cause of you written by theman
    K.I.M. written by Daniel Barlow
    A Tounge Lashing written by teika5
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Devil's Presents (Gift wrapped number One) written by endlessgame23
    Ritual Hunger written by endlessgame23
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    lost in translation written by robbie
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Last Correspondence written by Angeles
    Rehab written by theman
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    in Dar written by expiring_touch
    psychedelics written by Daniel Barlow
    Your Love Was Enough written by poetotoe
    Aster written by Daniel Barlow
    Shadows written by Daniel Barlow
    Silent Hill written by endlessgame23
    Unselfish written by theman
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    August Falls Down written by endlessgame23

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry