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    dots Submission Name: donedots

    Author: Beulah
    Elite Ratio:    4.78 - 588/414/44
    Words: 22
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 551
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 199


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    unspoken reverie
    of our
    deepening chasm

    gazing through
    each other

    quietly assessing
    the widening gap
    of yet another
    silent year

    Submitted on 2009-05-13 08:38:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Hi daar liefkind. Ek kan dink waaroor hierdie een gaan. "Done".

    Keep up the good faith and a bridge may appear to span the gap - either to the other side or: for a better years.

    Luv Dad.
    | Posted on 2009-05-13 00:00:00 | by Joachim | [ Reply to This ]
      Short poems aren't really my eye candy, not enough to titillate the taste buds ya dig. But then again, most people don't do it right, so of course it's goin to leave the poem with much to be desired from the reader. You on the other hand...have compiled just enough words with deep enough meanings to turn, what, 20 words, into a freakin epic poem. Now that may be O.Di. (Over Doin it) but I've read this jawn ("thing" for those of us who aren't into philly slang) like six times, which is one of the beauties of short poems, and it got deeper each time.

    I usually would give a favorite line at this point, but to tell you the truth, all these lines put together wouldn't even make up a typical verse for me (I'm not making fun, just stating a fact) so I'm just goin to say that they poem has struck me as a very good construction.

    | Posted on 2009-05-13 00:00:00 | by red_summer | [ Reply to This ]

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