Short poems aren't really my eye candy, not enough to titillate the taste buds ya dig. But then again, most people don't do it right, so of course it's goin to leave the poem with much to be desired from the reader. You on the other hand...have compiled just enough words with deep enough meanings to turn, what, 20 words, into a freakin epic poem. Now that may be O.Di. (Over Doin it) but I've read this jawn ("thing" for those of us who aren't into philly slang) like six times, which is one of the beauties of short poems, and it got deeper each time.
I usually would give a favorite line at this point, but to tell you the truth, all these lines put together wouldn't even make up a typical verse for me (I'm not making fun, just stating a fact) so I'm just goin to say that they poem has struck me as a very good construction.