Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: closing doorsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ladiesplanet1
    ASL Info:    23.cali baby
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 720/463/165
    Words: 163
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Longing
    Total Views: 386
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 957



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsclosing doorsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    i stand here locked inside my soul
    im safe while the rest of the world gets cold
    im not sure how long til this gets old
    but right now im yours to hold
    my heart was dying
    my heart was crying
    im so sick of lying
    cuz im only trying
    to make things right
    why do we fight
    all night all night
    when will the sun rise
    back into the sky
    when will i ever learn to fly
    take me away from here
    my love my dear
    what is this noise you fear
    when will this raincloud clear
    and everything fades away
    with every word you say
    cuz youre here when the world is gray
    so what more could i ask for
    you dont have to hold me anymore
    cuz i cant see you
    i cant feel you next to me


    where does she go
    when she roams
    all alone
    so far from home
    another door shell close




    Submitted on 2009-05-22 13:41:28     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      There's potential in this absolutely. Kind of lost my attention at the end same type of talk throughout the piece but, well put together it would be a nice acoustic song or something err other.

    Thanks for sharing.

    Pablo De-jesus
    | Posted on 2009-05-22 00:00:00 | by Cannablisjunkie | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    174699

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Dream written by closetpoet
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Birds of a Feather written by poetotoe
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Etiquette written by saartha
    The World written by jjd
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Cover written by saartha
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Carry written by saartha

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry