This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -
 

Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

devils drink


Author: joezwells
Elite Ratio:    3.79 - 64 /79 /55
Words: 29
Class/Type: Poetry /Fuck it all
Total Views: 1090
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 187



Description:


alcohol is the devil!


devils drink



temtaion makes the soul flicker
growing desire makes the cloudiness thicker
sent of hell makes the body sicker
how is it not known that the devil made liquor?




Submitted on 2009-05-23 22:55:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  Wonderful message with great rhyming.. that's pretty clever of you.

Quite powerful too in essence... Devil made liquor to ensnare and destroy the human soul.. Well Done!!!
| Posted on 2009-07-04 00:00:00 | by Myrrh | [ Reply to This ]
  mmm short but its to the point LOVE IT. Is this about your past choices? And how hard it is to stay away from the the tempting things that had your attention back then? That's what I'm taking from this short write, its a good write tho I can see what you have written in my head!

Jackz
| Posted on 2009-06-08 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



174751