Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Your Big Picturedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 55
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 691
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 379



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYour Big Picturedots
    -------------------------------------------


    You hold the big picture
    as well as any frame.
    Your eagle eyes never land.
    Clarity strains your sight,
    gives you a thought hangover,
    covers that pleasant blankness
    in your mind,
    so your view is as a bomb target.
    Perhaps one day the field
    will be like a gunsite.
    Someday you'll look
    instead of see.




    Submitted on 2004-07-16 15:33:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      im liking this idea and i really like the line about the thought hangover...enjoyed it as always...i swear maybe im nut but i swear even when you smile in your pictures ...and seem happy your eyes still make you look sad...i know im nut...hehe...well anyways loved your write as always...smiles ange
    | Posted on 2004-07-17 00:00:00 | by purplesun24 | [ Reply to This ]
      Amy, I'm honestly not a very smart person. I just know how to fake it on occasion to mask the truth. I don't understand this poem. I really can't comment more than that. Sorry.
    | Posted on 2004-07-18 00:00:00 | by Black Rock Tractor | [ Reply to This ]
      What helpred me understaind your piece was the war analogy- the little details instead of the big picture. Myself, I'm the opposite of this- I never care for the big picture. I am sadly surrounded by the people from your poem.
    However, this piece seems... dim. Too generic. Perhaps it's the shortness of the whole thing that throws me.
    | Posted on 2004-07-18 00:00:00 | by Raven E. | [ Reply to This ]
      i had to read this a few times to get (what i think is) the full understanding. some people only see the big picture and lose all the details. the more i read this, the more i like it. it just took me a few times! lol! it's been a long week, and i've been with pre-schoolers all day!
    You hold the big picture
    As well as any frame...
    i love that! and, yeah, hopefully one day this person will actually look at what's before them instead of just seeing... there is definitely a difference. very nice, amy!
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      i think i meant that they don't see the big picture... i mean, well, you can see the big picture but lose the details... anyway, i think i know what i mean, but then again, maybe i don't! lol!
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      wonderful read, made me think of a soldier in a war for a reason he only thinks he understands on his narrow need to know basis, please read my rap empty is phil, i think your poem and mine run parallel lines even though we are different in style...ciao
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by orpheus | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the lines "Clarity strains your sight / Gives you a thought hangover." Never thought of describing a headache that way. For some reason, though I do like the poem and what it says, the poems feels somewhat empty; vague. Like a person is talking to me, but she's omniscent. But I dunno. I'm just a kid.
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by Chihuahuii | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an interesting piece. How about- Leaving you hung-over by thought. "that pleasant blankness" that is so funny to me. I don't think it's meant to be funny, but I like it. I like the distinction between Look and see. Looking is deliberate, active. Anywho, nice write. Cheerio
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by nicelyJ | [ Reply to This ]
      Ignorance is bliss - but you miss a lot of things. so I personally don't prefer ignorance. your images are amazing but that's nothing new. the ending is great, holds the message very well. only one thing: I think 'oneday' (l.9) needs to be two words.
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      By seeing but not really looking people miss so much. He can see the forest but not each tree. He can tell you he sees a field of flowers but could not describe a single bloom.

    My ex was like this. It was hard to take. They limit themselves so much and walk around ignorant to what is real.
    | Posted on 2004-07-17 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    17480

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by Chelebel
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Linger written by saartha
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Giving written by jjd
    This written by Chelebel
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Incubus written by monad
    Bond written by saartha
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Push written by JanePlane
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    The Promise written by annie0888

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry