Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Your Big Picturedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 55
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 656
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 379



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYour Big Picturedots
    -------------------------------------------


    You hold the big picture
    as well as any frame.
    Your eagle eyes never land.
    Clarity strains your sight,
    gives you a thought hangover,
    covers that pleasant blankness
    in your mind,
    so your view is as a bomb target.
    Perhaps one day the field
    will be like a gunsite.
    Someday you'll look
    instead of see.




    Submitted on 2004-07-16 15:33:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      im liking this idea and i really like the line about the thought hangover...enjoyed it as always...i swear maybe im nut but i swear even when you smile in your pictures ...and seem happy your eyes still make you look sad...i know im nut...hehe...well anyways loved your write as always...smiles ange
    | Posted on 2004-07-17 00:00:00 | by purplesun24 | [ Reply to This ]
      Amy, I'm honestly not a very smart person. I just know how to fake it on occasion to mask the truth. I don't understand this poem. I really can't comment more than that. Sorry.
    | Posted on 2004-07-18 00:00:00 | by Black Rock Tractor | [ Reply to This ]
      What helpred me understaind your piece was the war analogy- the little details instead of the big picture. Myself, I'm the opposite of this- I never care for the big picture. I am sadly surrounded by the people from your poem.
    However, this piece seems... dim. Too generic. Perhaps it's the shortness of the whole thing that throws me.
    | Posted on 2004-07-18 00:00:00 | by Raven E. | [ Reply to This ]
      i had to read this a few times to get (what i think is) the full understanding. some people only see the big picture and lose all the details. the more i read this, the more i like it. it just took me a few times! lol! it's been a long week, and i've been with pre-schoolers all day!
    You hold the big picture
    As well as any frame...
    i love that! and, yeah, hopefully one day this person will actually look at what's before them instead of just seeing... there is definitely a difference. very nice, amy!
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      i think i meant that they don't see the big picture... i mean, well, you can see the big picture but lose the details... anyway, i think i know what i mean, but then again, maybe i don't! lol!
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      wonderful read, made me think of a soldier in a war for a reason he only thinks he understands on his narrow need to know basis, please read my rap empty is phil, i think your poem and mine run parallel lines even though we are different in style...ciao
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by orpheus | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the lines "Clarity strains your sight / Gives you a thought hangover." Never thought of describing a headache that way. For some reason, though I do like the poem and what it says, the poems feels somewhat empty; vague. Like a person is talking to me, but she's omniscent. But I dunno. I'm just a kid.
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by Chihuahuii | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an interesting piece. How about- Leaving you hung-over by thought. "that pleasant blankness" that is so funny to me. I don't think it's meant to be funny, but I like it. I like the distinction between Look and see. Looking is deliberate, active. Anywho, nice write. Cheerio
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by nicelyJ | [ Reply to This ]
      Ignorance is bliss - but you miss a lot of things. so I personally don't prefer ignorance. your images are amazing but that's nothing new. the ending is great, holds the message very well. only one thing: I think 'oneday' (l.9) needs to be two words.
    | Posted on 2004-07-16 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      By seeing but not really looking people miss so much. He can see the forest but not each tree. He can tell you he sees a field of flowers but could not describe a single bloom.

    My ex was like this. It was hard to take. They limit themselves so much and walk around ignorant to what is real.
    | Posted on 2004-07-17 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    17480

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Whispered written by endlessgame23
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    The World written by jjd
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry