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    dots Submission Name: decrepitdots

    Author: dismentled
    ASL Info:    26/M/"South of Heaven"
    Elite Ratio:    4.06 - 625/583/217
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Gothic
    Total Views: 416
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 838


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Wanna break down
    fall to the floor
    Curl up in a ball
    and die once more
    Not decomposing
    ravaged by decay
    lost myself
    yet here I stay;
    donít know whatís wrong
    but nothings right
    Iíve grown decrepit
    Just fighting for life
    Wanna pull the flesh
    right from my bones
    take a microscope
    and look for my soul

    And if you donít
    know me
    you might just
    think Iím crazy
    but if you really
    know me
    you know how
    itís so very true!...

    The voices in my head
    Just wonít shut down
    With all my smiles
    being down upside frowns
    could kill myself
    or just better yet you

    but ďrealityĒ calling
    so I guess Iím through.

    Submitted on 2009-05-31 19:33:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I loved this SO much....until the very last 2 lines.
    dk, just might have done it differently?

    the rest of it was amazing though <3.

    And if you donít
    know me
    you might just
    think Iím crazy
    but if you really
    know me
    you know how
    itís so very true!...
    ^probably tattooed inside my head now. pretty sweet <3.

    really descriptive, in your face writing, even moreso than usual and I definitely like ;)

    awesome stuff Bri <3
    love you <3
    | Posted on 2009-09-12 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]
      DAM! you have talent right off the bat I knew this was a fast pace read! I like how you went to one though then right onto the next as if we are also the ones feeling what you are writing and feeling as well I am in disbelief that I am the first to comment these people are nuts! Although I must admit the only part I felt that didn't fit or at least needs work on is...

    And if you donít
    know me
    you might just
    think Iím crazy
    but if you really
    know me
    you know how
    itís so very true!...

    Other than this I truly feel its an amazing post!


    Also the ripping of your flesh and searching for your soul AMAZING description LOVED IT
    | Posted on 2009-08-15 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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