Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Jonquilsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Andz
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 238/100/46
    Words: 177
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 106
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1197



    Description:
       WC junkies Methadone program


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsJonquilsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    There is beauty in stabilised ruins;
    rusting scaffolds, prickling hessian,
    and summer rooms vapoury drapery
    limp before damp frosted glass.

    I can’t believe everything’s still here.

    Daphne permeates naked timbers
    porous cracked and powdery bricks;
    roils in on floor draughts up dingy passage ways
    drawn by cold chimneys to each room.

    I can’t believe summer hasn’t taken them.

    I can’t believe the roof still stands
    under four seasons of leaves; from
    that old walnut, bare, girdled tightly by ivy
    murdered by the merciful sun last season,

    it would offer up sweet fruits
    if only someone would beat the cockatoos.
    I lean into the garden to gather up jonquils
    shiver to feel this old place was never left alone.

    I can almost smell raisin toast, cinnamon,
    and hear those children excited by brand new lambs,
    but the breeze nipped the back of my neck, tucking memories
    right back to yesterday when I forgot.

    But I remembered enough to pick the jonquils,
    and bring them to you.




    Submitted on 2009-06-03 17:48:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i enjoyed reading this very much.
    it is very atmospheric but you have carefully, and very cleverly, not told us too much, so we are able to intertwine our own personal story in with the beautiful scene you have set for us and you are able to keep your own personal thoughts close to your chest.

    i also very much like your bishop's palace photograph. it is clear that you are skilled behind the lens.
    thank you for such a lovely read.

    J
    | Posted on 2009-06-06 00:00:00 | by Alter idem | [ Reply to This ]
      I left you a comment on this at WC as you know...

    I love this kind of descriptive writing. It actually reminds of the ability Hanuman has for taking you somewhere with words. I don't possess that kind of talent.

    One question though, how do all these poems of yours [two] relate to that one picture?

    I love this.
    | Posted on 2009-06-03 00:00:00 | by Daniel Barlow | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.