I like it, but I think it you could a lot more to it to make it so much better then it is now. I think its good, but like most things it could be better and with this since its so short and the images are vivid I think it'd be something worth a bit of developing haha nice write.
It seems rather short, and free verse, at least for the first few lines. I prefer rhymes, but I rather liked it. The whole religious view was interesting, though, I think that it was a metaphor for something, though I'm not quite sure what. Keep up the good work.