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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Let it godots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dark Dann
    ASL Info:    18/ Male/ San Diego
    Elite Ratio:    6.44 - 78/67/53
    Words: 139
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 692
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 952



    Description:
       This is something that just came to me after my last talk with a "kiss and tell" girl. She kissed me, then told me she didn't love me and left me for some guy online. Gruesome experience that has left it's mark on me in so many ways. It doesn't have a point, nor a certain object. but it made me feel better writing it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLet it godots
    -------------------------------------------


    Let it go, don't look back.
    Don't you dare see the black
    In my eyes. A single beat,
    channeling heat.
    It rings in my ears;
    your voice so dear.
    what can I say?
    I couldn't save the day.
    You're heart is gone,
    while mine was your pawn.


    Let it go, don't look back
    Or else I will attack.
    With a string of words
    to pierce your soul
    I hold no remorse;
    I want you gone.

    This strange feeling,
    what were you stealing?
    So much is gone,
    along with the dawn
    of my dreams.
    my screams
    pierce the night
    you left me alone tonight

    again...
    again...

    let it go, don't look back.
    Or else I will attack
    With a string of words
    to pierce your soul
    I hold no remorse;
    I want you gone.




    Submitted on 2009-06-12 18:10:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Dampire, it's deep and the way you worded it made me whish I could write like that myself. My favirote line was "So much is gone,
    along with the dawn
    of my dreams."
    It made me think of how hope rises like a dawn to the night time of life, how even in the darkest hour's there's some form of light, an angel's face in the mirror were looking at. No one's truely bad ...... but that's not really on topic >.> I'm easily side tracked, sorry.
    | Posted on 2009-07-31 00:00:00 | by Scaredheart | [ Reply to This ]
      Reading this piece reminds me of a lot, not so much a specific incident, but a life in all. Most of the poem flowed, but some of the lines broke the rhythm, which I believe took alot of the quality out the the whole work. I think this could be rewritten, with alot of headway if you gave it the time.
    | Posted on 2009-06-12 00:00:00 | by intodesi | [ Reply to This ]


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