Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Time Recedesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dreamer5009
    ASL Info:    16, Male, USA
    Elite Ratio:    5.02 - 73/53/28
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Serious
    Total Views: 628
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1011



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTime Recedesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Long ago, deep in the past
    there was nothing to make it last
    the days were long, the years were short
    it all went by with nothing to report
    and we all sang out our plea's
    the night that time recedes

    Time Recedes
    pulling us back
    Time Recedes
    ain't cutting us no slack
    careful where you sow your seeds
    the night that time recedes

    You find it's often not told
    the idea that time sold
    you listen to it's words, all lies
    your mind, outraged, then outcries
    from everything your ear receives
    you have learned, time deceives

    Time Deceives
    pulling us in
    Time Deceives
    with a wide grin
    careful of ideas your mind conceives
    when time deceives

    Time Recedes
    pulling us back
    Time recedes
    ain't cutting us no slack
    careful where you sow your seeds
    when time recedes




    Submitted on 2009-06-13 00:41:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The repetition makes your poems good songs. Do you sing them? The music of this one is like small waves on a beach during ebb tide.
    | Posted on 2009-06-14 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      i didnt comment on this one.wow.surprise.
    i loved it!
    rachel:)
    | Posted on 2009-06-13 00:00:00 | by PopRocksRae | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    175422

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry