[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: to scareddots

    Author: Fadeintoreality
    Elite Ratio:    1.95 - 33/114/64
    Words: 227
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 507
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1406


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsto scareddots

    I shielded my face from the sun
    Too afraid to run
    I stood there in shame, hiding from truth
    Disrespecting His name

    I stood there in shame, and held my hands to my face
    Covering up tears with my blood soaked hands.
    My hate and indiscretion showed that day
    As the young man lay
    The man that took my brothers life
    The man who has a wife,
    A son and a daughter.
    I washed away this mans sins with his blood
    Rather than with Holy Water.

    I hide my face with guilt and shame.
    For a man who was drunk took my brother's life.
    A man who had two children,
    And a loving wife.

    She rushed to his side,
    Asking me WHY?
    As she held him in her hands,
    She sat there and cried.

    Unable to speak,
    She slapped me with her hand.
    Leaving an angry, red hand print
    to remind me of my hate.

    She cried to me,
    "You've killed the wrong man!"

    What have I done?!
    What have I done to this man I didn't know?
    I took his life
    For I thought he was the one who took my brother's soul?

    I knelt there with gun in hand
    Too guilty to run,
    I held it to my head
    Not one man lay,
    But two lay dead.

    Submitted on 2009-06-23 12:07:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    i loved it.
    it was powerful and moving and amazing well written and im going to add it as my favortie cus it is incredible.
    | Posted on 2009-06-23 00:00:00 | by PopRocksRae | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Every..... written by jackz
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    The Azores written by poetotoe
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    True Death written by layDsayD
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Fasade written by jackz
    Dashboard Light written by layDsayD
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Summer written by layDsayD
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Carry written by saartha
    Cover written by saartha
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Ache written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Push written by JanePlane
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Love written by saartha
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]