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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Erasedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: submarine
    Elite Ratio:    2.4 - 128/91/45
    Words: 72
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 559
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 510



    Description:
       betrayal hurt pain


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsErasedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Erase the pain
    Make me forget
    The words you said
    Promises made
    Let it be undone

    Wipe away these tears
    Make it disappear
    Every feeling and flutter
    Your touch
    Let it be unfelt

    Erase the hurt
    Dont want to feel
    Your betrayal
    My pain
    Let it be unreal

    Don't want to remember
    Ever again
    Want to close my eyes
    Let it all be Erased







    Submitted on 2009-06-25 08:54:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Although you give good representation of the words you used, what it lacks is in your face drive.
    To achieve this add some metaphors and similes.

    Have a great day! Nuda-Yonv
    | Posted on 2009-06-26 00:00:00 | by NudaYonv | [ Reply to This ]


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