Have you sent this to him? You should, it might help! And his betrayal was the ultimate, but you allowed nothing. Would you tell a rape victim they allowed it, or another child who suffered through what you have? I don't think you would because you know that isn't true.
YOU ALLOWED NOTHING!!!
You were a child give yourself a break.
I love this I have written similar pieces to my father who didn't sexually abuse me there was and is emotional and mental abuse. Any abuse is hard and does damage even if it's just to the soul that seems to be the worst part of it. The part that is hardest to heal.
What a sad and painful story. The love and trust of a father to a young girl is so important, and to have that trust violated must be a tragic and terrible thing. We are all diminished when an important trust is broken, and this would be the worst of all.
It is good that you can write your thoughts out, as I think that is far better than holding it in and being silent about it. I think you have the affection and best wishes of all here at Elite.