Description: i don't know... i'm still just trying t come up with something good, but it's always coming out forced. i need some advice.
Things fall Apart -------------------------------------------
Things fall apart
Words crumble, hearts break
You thought you could forget
But it was more than you could take
Things are forgotten
People are left, and ignored
Life isnít what we imagine
Sometimes, we yearn for more
Sorry doesnít cut it
Our hearts hold onto pain
We struggle to understand it
And humor struggles to entertain
Because light doesnít come
To those who sit in the dark
Waiting for the answers
Without trying to take a part
In discovering what is out there
Without trying to find some glue
For the many little pieces
That were once attached to you
I happen to think this is a fairly riveting piece and it does have great potential. I reckon that if you broke this into stanzas and added some punctuation you would get something way better and therefore more powerful, too boot. Also, I would suggest to avoid being too obvious and leave something that can be open for interpretation.
I guess, that the beauty of poetry lies in the fact that people can have their on take on a piece whenever this allows you to, in my book.
I did relish the lines such as "And humor struggles to entertain" I completely relate to that line particularly from where I'm standing.