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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Dying.. Slowlydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/380
    Words: 185
    Class/Type: Deep Thought/Fuck it all
    Total Views: 572
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 1265



    Description:
       If your going to try and end things... make sure it will do its job.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDying.. Slowlydots
    -------------------------------------------


    All I'm seeing in my head...
    My stepfather touching me

    My Mother knowingly does nothing

    My biological Father NOT even in the picture


    So I decide to put the 12 gauge shot gun to use!

    Placing this heavy piece of metal on my lap
    Begin playing with the safety as I stare into space
    re-living all the pain, all the heartache

    My stepfather touching me

    My mother knowingly does nothing

    My biological Father not even in the picture


    I SNAP
    Pull the trigger

    Safety is OFF

    I just shot a 12 gauge rifle with buck shot rounds
    Into my stomach

    My ears are ringing
    Why can I not hear?

    My stomach... it hurts
    Dave pulls my shirt up..
    My insides are now on the outside

    He rolls me on my side
    Part of my back is splattered on the couch

    Dave is saying goodbye
    ..... I am dying.....




    Submitted on 2009-07-04 14:54:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hm... I dunno what to say. If this poem is honest or not. If it is I can understand the metaphor of the shotgun: the fear of becoming pregnant and also the shock of the first period. But I dunno, I feel a bit skeptical at this hour. Made me think though, that's always a good thing...
    | Posted on 2009-07-04 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]
      Different!! I can honestly say I have never read a poem about suicide as a way out of sexual abuse quite like this. It grips you holds you and keeps you hanging on till the end holding your breath.

    Great Great write.!!


    trynfinity
    | Posted on 2009-07-04 00:00:00 | by trynfinity | [ Reply to This ]


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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
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