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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: trippin outdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Thief
    ASL Info:    22/male/plainview
    Elite Ratio:    4.8 - 180/80/69
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 517
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 589



    Description:
       i'll finsh this later


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotstrippin outdots
    -------------------------------------------


    corpse like bodies fall from the sky
    crimson tears escape my eyes
    looks like blood, taste like candy
    this aint natural, whats wrong with me?
    theres voices, but nobody's around
    i wanna scream but cant make a sound
    my body is numb, all i can do is blink
    if i try to move i think i sink
    this cant be reality....
    it has to be a dream
    i just gotta wake up for it to be over!
    or...maybe im too high, i just gotta get sober
    im just triippin and over-reacting
    yeah, thats what it is, just wait and see




    Submitted on 2009-07-14 14:36:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      This sounds so much like some of my older stuff.
    Especially the crimson tears escaping your eyes part, I always write about crimson tears.
    I like the kind of change in view at about the middle of this poem, when you decide your just to high, it was unexpected and nice.
    | Posted on 2010-09-19 00:00:00 | by girly101 | [ Reply to This ]
      the ending was a little rough but it depends on how someone reads into it.
    i liked the middle.
    "my body is numb, all i can do is blink
    if i try to move i think i sink"


    it was actully my favortie part of the poem.
    just because it went very well together and sort of roll right off my tounge when i said it.

    rachel:)


    | Posted on 2009-07-15 00:00:00 | by PopRocksRae | [ Reply to This ]


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