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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: untitleddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: purplesun24
    Elite Ratio:    4.41 - 1139/1171/167
    Words: 110
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 818
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 813



    Description:
       mind babble i havent written in months


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsuntitleddots
    -------------------------------------------


    We’ve broken through each others atmospheres.
    Feeling everything
    Filling everything
    Can we under stand
    This skin we are carrying around our hearts
    No different than
    Yesterdays
    tomorrows
    Doubts
    I cant keep doing this
    Packaging my thoughts in containers
    Sealing my fate
    Depleting
    And I’m thinking I shouldn’t
    But I will
    In your atmosphere

    I haven’t taken a breath…
    Of you in so long
    Our experiences
    Have rewound
    Repeated
    An instant in which I loved you
    Flashes through my mind
    The thought of your touch
    Disturbs me
    My soul cringes
    Hiding within the crevice of my heart
    As I lie next to you at night…





    Submitted on 2009-07-18 20:19:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I love this, I feel theres alot here and that it just needs to be spaced out and tweaked a little bit. So I figured I would give it a go.



    "We’ve broken through each others atmospheres.

    Feeling,
    Filling,
    everything

    Can we under stand
    That the skin surounding our hearts
    No different than
    Yesterdays
    or
    tomorrows
    Doubts

    Cant keep doing this
    Packaging thoughts in containers

    Sealing my fate
    Depleting
    And thinking I shouldn’t
    But I will
    In your atmosphere

    Haven’t taken a breath…
    Of you in so long
    Our experiences
    Have rewound
    and
    Repeated

    An instant in which I loved you
    Flashes through my mind
    The thought of your touch disturbs
    and my soul cringes
    Hiding within the crevice of my heart
    As I lie next to you at night

    Haven’t taken a breath…
    Of you in so long
    Our experiences
    Have rewound
    and
    Repeated..."

    Is everything ok beautifll? I hope you don't mind me playing around with this, but you know your writing always get me poetically aroused!
    | Posted on 2009-07-19 00:00:00 | by Mithrandir | [ Reply to This ]


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